Thursday, May 19, 2005
Keeping the oil
Okay. Last post was a bit bleak. My first encounter with a homeschooling mother's rigidity. I talked with my wonderful Iowa homeschooling friend mom who said that was, unfortunately, somewhat normal. She explained how to navigate, how to count your losses, how to understand the mama-bear approach that these women often have. I felt better, yet still confused about who to connect with. Should I go with the secular group and, perhaps, experience more tolerance for Cody? Or, should I seek out people with grace in the Christian group? I even know some people, why not connect more with them? Yes, an old shyness inhibits me too, although I've pushed way past that in the last 20 years. We shall see as time goes on.
Morning reading .... I love the book of Matthew. The story of the virgins with oil lamps is one of my favorite. I want to be one who preserves what she has in order to be included in the bridegroom's feast. It has been one of those parables that float in my mind much. The sheep and the goats (I was hungry and you fed me, ....) also is so full of wisdom and challenge. The reading about the arrival of the son of man brought about those apocalyptic visions which were so common in childhood, thanks to my pentecostal grandmother; I can read them now without fear, but with intense longing that I will be caught up in his glory, unsurprised, prepared, unswayed by falsity. It's a beautiful, mystical vision that the sky will open, wear out, and I will be swept up into .... ah, yes, fulfillment of desire, saturation, completion.
Crazy sounding, yes, but written down for belief. I believe.
Posted by Fieldfleur at 8:34 AM