Sunday, April 17, 2005

Higher than

"But he gives us more grace...." over inner strife, envy, anger, worry, all the negative emotions happening within us. In addition, James tells us to submit ourselves to God and draw near, and He will draw near to us.

I love how these words in the Bible rise up when I'm most unhappy, seeking, still seeking for the active, loving God in my life. And, then I can spy him in my fog, through time-honored words and presence, and he says, like an old spry, "I see you clearly and want to give you something to remember me by." Eyes gleaming, rivaling Gandalf, or Jesus in any Hollywood movies, or Aslan to the Narnian kids, his true glowy Spirit hearkens me back into what I need.

Promises and hope. What would our lives be without them? I sometimes agonize over the difficult mental / spiritual work that being a Christian takes. (It's just so hard to be walking the balance of becoming more like Christ when I want to take over all the work! and the joy!) A friend and I lamented over a couple hour long phone call this weekend about it. I look to her for her joy in spirit, yet she had admissions as well. Only promises and hope make it worthwhile.

Thank you, Lord that grace is higher than doubt, than shortcomings, than worry. I want to turn myself over to that completely, and within this, do what you will with my life. Let me trust and allow that scary surrender to plunge me under into an altered vision of life, buoyed by your grace and care. Amen.

1 comment:

lady laura said...

Beautiful, my friend.