Wednesday, July 06, 2005

The teacher waved me down as I pulled away from the two week summer enrichment program at a nearby private school.
"How can I help him best?" she asked immediately. "Yesterday, he didn't listen, bounced off the walls, and then I figured out from your note on the medical form that he has Asperger's."
I disclosed anxiously, furtively, and last minute yesterday prior to dropping him off. I saw the paragraph which stated that unruly kids would be sent home and money would be forfeited, so I scrawled a few words about "autism spectrum disorder" and left him behind. It wasn't to pull the hood over anyone's eyes.
Often, I just want to see if he will pass through undetected, like Asperger's is a mislabel, like Cody is growing out of it. Like we can all breathe easier that life will be less challenging.
She named it, though, and had 'another Asperger's before' in prior teaching.
Again, I'll be reaching soon for the books that help me understand my own reactions and disappointments, his own frustrations and thwarted desires, the strain in our marriage due to working through these issues (another strain would be revealed w/o this, though).
I want to strain these "problems" and perceive their elemental blessings. I hear the cliche that everyone states: "It's all how you look at things that determine whether they're curses or blessings." It's hard to believe that they have real, pressing 24 hour issues on their plates. Yet, I know there's good to be found, we do find it occassionally, I don't want it to pass by unharvested. He's an awesome kid who just happens to have this sickness.
God be with us and others who fight in the fog. The search continues for clarity.

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